Kids Are Cute

I know most people think their relatives-specifically little kids-are funny.

This afternoon, my mom and I went to my cousin Kerra's house for her son's (Noah's) 4th birthday party (he turns 4 tomorrow). Kerra also has a 2 year old daughter (Emma) and a 16 month old son (Dillon).

Cute and funny things they said:

Noah

Kerra was telling us about how her brother-in-law (40 years old) had a car accident the night after his high school prom. Noah: On Indian School. We looked at Kerra wondering, what? Kerra: That's right, it happened on Indian School

*Note* Noah's mind is a steal trap for information-Amazing for a three year old.

Kerra: What were the last few cars Uncle had?
Noah: A Chevy, Ford, and Toyota.
Kerra: What does he drive now?
Noah: A Honda

Kerra: Where does Mommy bank?
Noah: Wells Fargo
Kerra: What about Daddy?
Noah: Chase and Wells Fargo?
Kerra: Uncle?
Noah: Compass
Kerra: Where did Mommy used to bank, but not anymore?
Noah: Bank of America
Kerra: Who works for Chase bank?
Noah: Auntie Carolyn

Amazing really.

Opening Presents:

"Oh, more clothes." :(

Dillon

Sees a spoon, gets an incredibly happy grin on his face, and says, "Poon."

And Emma

Kerra rented one of those huge bouncing things. At the end of the party, Kerra walked over and unplugged it. I stayed with Emma as we watched it deflate.

Emma: What's happening?
Sarah: It's deflating. The air is falling out.
Emma: Good night bouncy. Have a nice rest. See you soon!

Use Your Panic Voice Please

Last night, Shawn and I were sitting out back, relaxing for a few before we went to bed. He goes in the house, and I hear him say "Sarah." Okay, I also heard water running, like the washing machine, only louder. Anyway, I say, "Yes?" Pause, pause, pause...then..."Sarah." I yell, "What?" Again, nothing....water....silence from him.

I heave a sigh (why call my name, then not answer after I answer?), open the sliding glass door, and step in water. Yuck. Shawn comes in from the hallway, hauling towels, completely soaked on one side. He asks, "Where is the water shut off valve?" Meanwhile, underneath the kitchen sink, water is shooting out. Hard too. Not up, not down, but straight out into the kitchen. I panic. "It's out front!" He follows me as I try and run out the side door, almost slip because, duh, water all over the floor, and race to the front of the house. I am freaking out, trying to find the stupid nozzle, plus it's dark outside. The more flustered I get, the less my body obeys me. I think everyone has this problem when it's panic time. Except Shawn, which we will discuss more in detail later.

So I leave him fumbling with the stupid water handle thing as a thought occurs to me as I run back into the water-soaked kitchen. Just turn the water off under the sink right? Common sense, I tell myself. So I get in front of the sink, bad idea-water shooting out-remember? Okay, off to the side then. Reach in, trying blindly to find that water shut-off valve. I find it. Or, I should say, I found where it should be. The handle's not there. Water is shooting out where it should be. Ah, I see the handle now. It's floating in the pool that is our cabinet.

Shawn shuts off the main water line, and we can finally survey damage. Broken handle in my hand, check. Him soaked, check. Water turned off, check. Half an inch of water on the kitchen floor, check. Look out back, patio soaked with water, check. We start hauling more towels and paper towels to clean the mess. Oh, forgot this part. He takes the handle from me and says, "It busted." Check.

Haul out the rug to dry, mop up water, dog fur, and anything else that was originally on the floor. Should have swept and mopped earlier, like I planned. Finally, after many towels, a half a roll of paper towels, finagling the handle back on the valve (in the off position), he turns the main water back on. The kitchen does not flood. Water doesn't even drip from the sink valve. Cool-Shawn fixed it. I reach under to turn on the kitchen water, and it goes a little crazy. Okay, not fixed, but not leaking or shooting water like a geyser.

I must say, after all that water, I really had to pee. So I trot to the bathroom; he follows to wash his hands. I start giggling. "What," he asks me. "You really need to work on your panic voice." "My panic voice huh? Why?" I explain to him it sounds like his normal voice, thus me not coming right away when he needed my help. I hope I gave him food for thought.

Meanwhile, the bad thing is that I can't use my dishwasher or the kitchen sink until the valve is replaced. The good thing is I now do not have to sweep and mop. Check.

New Fun Things

Well, it took me a couple of days to figure it out, but I put 2 new toys on our blog.

The first is my e-hampster. If you move your mouse around his box, he follows you. You can click and drop food to him, or you can click and hold and give it to him. Also, click on the circle in his wheel, and he will jump on and run around. If you give him enough food, he will decide he is thirsty and get a drink. If you idle too long on my page (yeah right!), he will go to sleep. It's fun if you have a few minutes of you life to spare!

Under that are my e-fish. As most fish go, they are kinda boring, but they too will follow your mouse point around. You can click to deposit orange fish food for them too.

Hope you enjoy!

OMG

OMG-He COOKS!

It's lunch time. I am starving. I had to run to Home Depot (get air filters for the A/C-it's getting hot!), then I had to run to the library (I read through all my others-so I checked out 16-yes...sixteen...more).

I arrive back home. He is chillin' on the couch watching the sports channel. Ugh. Hmmm.....I think to myself. I am soooo hungry. I think also to myself, he must have eaten at work. So I heated up some lasagna, sit on the couch next to him, and he gets up. Well! Harrumph to him too! Didn't want to sit by him anyway. (Ah, now I can change the channel) And then this is what I hear coming from the kitchen...bang, slam, rattle-rattle, "Where's the thing?" he asks. I say, "What thing?" "You know....the cheese thing." AAAHH, I get it now. He wants the Salad Shooter, which also grates cheese. "In the cupboard above the bread." Oh, remember, be specific, since he truly doesn't know where things are except-bowls, tupperware, silverware, cups, and those pancake flipper things. "Right side of the cupboard, second shelf up, next to the tupperware." He says, "Got it, thanks!"

More rustling around. Yup, before you know it...."Where's the skillet?" Now, our kitchen is small with limited cupboard room, and I now know what he is going to cook, therefore, without even getting up from my own lunch, I say, "In the cupboard below my medicine.....(remember-specifics)....under the drawer that has the baggies and plastic wrap." He does know that drawer by the way.

Clanging, shuffling, smells...burning? Burning smell???? Just so you know, I am a pro at this smell. Why you ask? Well, because I have lit our stove on fire before. Twice. Lesson learned-don't throw water on your electric stove. Duh right? Nope, not me. Thankfully nothing broke or got electrocuted. Including myself. Oh, also, don't use flour. It is pretty flammable. So is salt. (Insert big mess after first fire). AND, you know you see in movies people flapping a dish towel at their stove fire? Well, it doesn't work. It makes it worse and scorches your towel. So for my public service duty for the day: please have a fire extinguisher or at least baking soda in your kitchen. Moving on.

I go into the kitchen, and I act super surprised. "You're cooking?!?!" "Of course, I'm part Mexican, woman! I can cook a lot of stuff." Note: he is not saying he is a Mexican woman. He is saying he is Mexican and calling me woman. Confusion over? OK. "You never cook for me," I wail. "Because you always do it," he replies quite smugly. Hmmm...think Sarah! "Well, okay, then you can cook me dinner on Sunday then," I hopefully say. "Fine, I will." Huh. That was easy.

"Pan... Pirate... Poppycock!"

Shawn went to England! Which is great for him for two specific reasons: He was born there, and he loves the story of Peter Pan. Sometimes I think he thinks he is Peter Pan. But with his 30th birthday coming up, we both know this isn't true. Still, if he had his way, he would be The Boy Who Never Grew Up. So of course while he was in England, he had to make at stop at Kensington Gardens to see...one of the statues....of Peter Pan!

And while visiting England, a "Beengland" made his acquaintance! The bee survived; Shawn did too!

Of course, Buckingham Palace. This is Queen Elizabeth's house. House, mansion, castle, palace...same thing. At the top, you can see that the flag is risen all the way up. This let's everyone know the Queen is home. For most folks, if your car is home, then you are probably home. For Elizabeth, it's the flag! So this means that people can't take inside tours of the Palace. I wouldn't want people coming to see my magnificent rooms if I were home either. I really wouldn't want them in my house even if I wasn't home...huh. The difference between common-folk like me and her Majesty I suppose.

This is Shawn's brother Shane. Whenever they are together, they are hilarious. I mean, they are pretty funny on their own, but when you put them together, it's a barrel of laughs. If you can't read the street sign, it says "Humps for 1/2 Mile." Boys, boys, boys.


And of course, Big Ben. He is a clock. He is Big. His name is Ben. I don't know why they named a clock or made it so big. Or why it has to be a boy. Couldn't it have been...Big Betty?

There were a ton more pictures they took. However, I have to share this one with you:

They also went to visit Ipswich Stadium (soccer people, not football). Upon entering, there is this sign. Just in case you wanted to catch a game after a hard day's work of: building a house with your TOOLS, playing a round of DARTS after a round of GOLF, while it was raining on your UMBRELLA, and while you carried a FLAGPOLE to beat off pesky mosquito's that attacked you after it rained. Sigh. Silly Englishmen!

So to wrap things up, Shawn brought home some presents. This is not all of them, but my personal favorites!

When Shawn was walking around London, he came across a man painting pictures on canvas. This is the one Shawn picked for me! Absolutely beautiful! It doesn't get more original than that!

As he was leaving Liverpool, he also picked up these two wall decorations. This is the one he bought for me! Aahhh, best man in the world that loves me to pieces!

And the one he got for himself:

*Sigh* Welcome home Humey!

Jealous of Blogs

I don't think many people read my blog. I go to Kalie's blog and she has....LISTS....(my fav thing) of friends who blog. None of my peeps blog. Except Kalie. So when I visit her sight, she has a ton of comments under her posts and her *sigh* many lists of friends that blog.

The people who do not read my blog or even create their own probably fall into the 20% of "Less than once a month" or the 53% of "I have not read a blog in the last 12 months." Oh well. So the point I am trying to make is that if I make a funny or need advice...I will only get it from two people. Kalie, who actually blogs and leaves comments, and my mom, who reads my blog then we will talk about it on the phone.

So I have a question. And it really isn't for me. It is for Shawn. And his brother and his wife, Shane and Cadey. See, Cadey is a first year resident (I think) and the hospital where she is at told her that come December, they will be unable to keep her as a resident due to budget cuts. (Figures). So she has been researching and she found a possible residency out of state. But Shawn would miss his brother sooo much. My question is this. Does anyone know what she can do to stay here? I would appreciate any suggestions. I do not want Shawn to be sad. Nor do I want Shane and Cadey to be sad. All of their family is here. And friends. I thank you for suggesting an alternative.

In the wise words of The Bard, I leave you with this:
I will always blog of course!

Home Alone

Well, I am home alone for a week. Shawn went to England with his dad and his brother. His parents gave him and his brother a trip with their dad for their birthdays. Shawn will be 30 next month!

I went to my mom's yesterday after I took Shawn to the airport. Spent the night (my mom's birthday was yesterday) and today went to the PBR with my dad for his birthday. March is by far the busiest month for birthdays! I've got my mom, dad, Shane, Shannon, and someone else I think....hmmm.....it's probably written on the calendar. I hope.

So anyway, today is the first day I am at home by myself. Well, I am usually at home by myself, but I know Shawn will be here after work. Alas, this is not the case for the next 5 1/2 days and 6 nights. It is just after 8 pm and I am bored. Really bored. I watched the 2 new episodes of Minute to Win It. It is really funny watching these people do these silly games.

Ugh. I am beginning to ramble. OOOH. The Real Housewives of Orange County Reunion 2 is on! Gotta go and catch up on my drama!